Questions asked during this time:

• Can I really and truly ever forgive?
• Why do I still feel so sad?
• How can I stop thinking about his affair?
• How can I stop blaming myself?
• Will the pain ever go away?
• Is it normal to feel worse?
• How can I get it out of my mind?
• How can I recover when divorce results?
• How can I regain my self-esteem?
• What are the stages of recovery?


What people say in this phase:

• It still hurts some days, but, not like a knife jabbing, life stopping, depressing, pain. It’s more like, this is sad, it hurts so bad to think about what happened to us, I feel like I need to cry for what we lost, I feel like sharing my feelings so I can get them out, more like an ache that makes me grateful that we still have love after all we have gone through.

What helped me through this phase:

• Finding a hobby that made me happy while doing it. Helps to get your mind off your problems and makes you feel useful again
• Prayer
• Friends and support of others that are marriage friendly
• Purposely trying to keep out the negative thoughts towards your straying partner.
• Knowing that there will always be improvement as long as I keep moving forward even if it’s not as fast as I would like it to be