The process may seem to be moving ever so slowly or maybe not at all but just know that as long as your moving in a forward direction from where you are today then your doing just fine. There is no time line as long as you are moving forward and not backward. Just make sure you give yourself plenty of time to process all your emotions before you forgive. If you forgive to quickly, you’ll find that it’s not real genuine forgiveness.

Forgiveness is a commitment and takes work and determination on your part. You may wonder why you still hurt so badly even though you have forgiven the other person. Forgiveness doesn’t take the hurt away. Remember that forgiveness means you no longer want to get revenge on the other person, and that you won’t use what the have done to hurt them. Healing the hurt is another process all in itself.

People ask, “If I forgive them does that mean we have to reconcile?” No, reconciliation is different than forgiveness. You can forgive someone and not want to reconcile with him or her. Maybe they are still caught up in the affair so reconciliation is not an option for you but you can still forgive them and move on in your life. Remember forgiveness is for you, not them. You can still forgive and not condone their behavior.

When you forgive and you let go of your feelings of anger, hatred, bitterness and revenge towards the other person, you get your life back. Your health improves and you find that you’re happy again and that good things are happening in your life again. You’ll find that when you don’t forgive that you’ll become an angry bitter person that no one wants to be around. I found this out the hard way, so I know it’s true.