This term is used by both experts and affair victims. It describes the euphoria that one feels when they are involved in an affair. Remember how it felt when you first fell in love? During this time, the one having an affair will rationalize their actions so that they can minimize their guilt. They will even take it so far as to “invent” reasons why they are having an affair to begin with. Healing the marriage is impossible while they are in this fog.
The one having an affair will convince themselves that they’re in a bad marriage and/or that their spouse never really loved or understood them, when in reality this is far from the truth. Soon, the one having an affair will begin to actually believe the lies they are telling themselves so they then begin to act accordingly by treating their spouse very badly yet treating their affair partner in an affectionate and loving way. This is exactly how to addiction of affairs starts to take off. Read the rest of this entry
If you are faced with surviving infidelity, then one thing I am sure you are struggling with is the subject of trust. As betrayed spouse’s, we now are extremely leery of anything our spouse’s say because we now know they are liars. We no longer trust what we hear them saying because all during their affair they did nothing but lie right to our faces. My husband had an affair that lasted for an entire year and for that whole year he lied right to my face. I remember how sincere he looked and how I believed what he was saying.
After I found out about his affair and I was struggling with surviving infidelity, I didn’t care how sincere he looked or sounded, I believed NOTHING that came out of his mouth because I knew he was VERY capable of lying right to my face. After someone breaks a promise a huge as being faithful, words become meaningless, and actions will mean absolutely everything! It really will come down to what your spouse does and not what they say. If you want to know if your spouse is truly sincere in wanting to save the marriage and is truly done with the other person then all you need to do is look at what they are doing and see if what they are doing matches with what they are saying. Your gut is going to tell you if what they are saying is NOT matching with what they are DOING. Read the rest of this entry
If you haven’t gone through a spouse’s affair then you have no idea the pain and devastation that is involved and how hard on someone surviving infidelity truly is. In the beginning stages of just finding out about the affair, you are literally balancing in between life and death. This isn’t just some bad day you’re having or something you just “get over”. I believe that surviving infidelity is worse than death and living through it is your worst nightmare. That is why I am here to give you a guide to help you through this devastating experience.
1. Be Kind To Yourself
Right now you need some pampering and comfort so let yourself. Buy new clothes, send some flowers to yourself, get your nails done, etc. You have to remind yourself that there is still good things in this world because right now everything probably looks dark and bleak. Even though you may not think so, your future still holds hope. Spend some time in the sun as this can lighten depression. Make a spa appointment so you can have something you can look forward to. Have a facial and maybe even get a new hairdo. Make yourself look and feel beautiful, even if you do not feel like it because you need to do this if you plan on surviving infidelity. Read the rest of this entry
Healing infidelity is never easy and is impossible to heal from alone. Many of those suffering from their spouse’s affair believe they have to do so in private because they are unable to tell anyone about what is happening to them. This is sad because it’s almost impossible to do alone. When you are dealing with infidelity on your own with no one to talk to or lean on it’s going to take you ten times longer to heal than those who seek out help from others. Just because you feel like you can’t talk to anyone, this is false because in today’s world there is always the internet. Read the rest of this entry
Did your spouse have an affair and you are now left struggling with getting over an affair? Are you still in a lot of pain and anger over their affair? Recovering from infidelity is not easy and it will take years before you both are healed from this devastation. Most people don’t like hearing that it takes years to heal from infidelity, but it is the truth. It was 4½ years before I could say that I was completely healed. I had spent years looking for answers to getting over an affair and ridding myself of the pain. Read the rest of this entry
Are you getting over an affair you spouse had and you are wondering why you are still in so much pain? Healing from affairs is no easy task and it can takes years before the pain goes away. Most people don’t want to hear that but it’s the truth. It took me four and a half years to be completely healed from my husband’s year long affair. I spent years searching for the answer to how to deal and get rid of my pain. Read the rest of this entry
Infidelity in marriage is the most devastating thing that can ever happen to you. When you first find out that your spouse has cheated on you, your whole world falls apart. It’s very hard to wrap your mind around the fact that your spouse, the one that claims to love you can do such a horrible thing to you. How can the person who vowed to love, honor and cherish you betray you in such a horrible way? When you just find out you are usually in shock and then you spend months unable to think about anything else. Read the rest of this entry
I have decided to start a new Infidelity Forum and I invite you all to come join in. I am hoping we can all give each other some good advice and just help each other because going through a spouse’s affair is the most devastating thing anyone can go through.
